Who needs a sauna suit?

So today was a weight watchers meeting, and I got on the scale, hopeful but not sure what to expect... and tada, I lost 8 lbs. woohoo. Its only one week, nothing really to get excited about, I know how easy it is to give up, get off track, so heres hoping I keep going. I was also a good dubie today and got the post office to stop sending my mail back lol. Alright, it just occured to me that all the pot heads out there are going... uh dubie?? but yeah, thats how someone in my life before has used the word.. I can't be sure it wasn't like saying, yeah, that was a good joint, but oh well. So I have a goal position... which I saw on a commercial for some product several years ago... It's gotta be some crazy stretch or Yoga position, but the woman had her foot in her hands... her hands were up over her head, she was leaning forward, and her leg was extended out and up behind her. I hope to be bendy and stretchy and without spare tires enough to do that pose.. and not fall over or die of pain. It will be a while.. probably over a year before I get there.. but thats what I get for being a chunky monkey.

Lets slim down.... one last time

On Friday, I joined Weight Watchers. My hope is that I will lose a ton of weight, in a healthy way... for the last time. Fat... one of the things you hope to lose and never find again lol. So I am trying again, after letting myself regain what I lost last time I tried, and then some. Some moments it is really easy, other moments I am pulling my hair out trying to figure out what to eat. The hard part is that I lack motivation. Last time, I was head over heals in love with someone, and decided that I had to lose weight for them to love me... it helped sooooo much. When that love went wrong... all my motivation disappeared, and I blew up like a blimp. This time I'm doing it because I want to, I know I need to, but still, there isn't enough motivation, so I'm pretty concerned that it isn't going to last, isn't going to stick. Also, on www.postsecret.com, or maybe in the book, there was a secret that someone was afraid that if they lost weight, they would have to deal with their fear of men... I didn't send in that secret, but I could have. Part of my reason to lose weight is so that I might have half a chance to get into a relationship, but then I remember that I'm terrified of that, so best case scenario, those two things simply cancel each other out in motivational factors. Lol, I almost wish that there was some kind "honesty" dating service... where someone would pair me up with a guy who doesn't mind a fatty mcfatty, and where I could go to the first date and say "Hi, how are you, I'm totally terrified". Then that would be off the table, and I wouldn't have to pretend that I am more socially adept, or less nervous than I would actually be. Then he would tell me something similar, and we would both feel better and live happily ever after. Ok, so thats jumping ahead a bit, but this is all make believe anyway, because even if there was such a service like that... I'm too much of a chicken shit to call them lol.Goodness gracious I'm one broken son of a gun. lol
On another note, I saw a long lost chatfriend online last night. He IM'd me and it totally made my night. I know enough about myself to know that if we talk on a regular basis, and he's as nice as he was last night, I will totally fall for him, and that might not be good, because ya know, its the internet, and we are so far apart, and we don't really know each other. But it was nice to feel the flutter of butterfly's when I think about talking to him. So, thats about it. Once I lose a bunch of weight, I will post my starting weight... but I'm still at the start so I can't do it yet.